Whenever I hit a snag in my life and then overcome it, I figure it is happening for you, so I can share it with you, and hopefully -- when you experience something similar -- perhaps my experience can help you. Recently, Jim had to have all but three teeth removed. He was born with weak teeth, which he inherited from both parents, and the past several years, they just kept cracking, breaking and falling out. Finally, with two abscesses, he decided it was time to get dentures.
Wanting to be very supportive, I just kept encouraging him to do what he feels he needs to do. So the teeth came out and Jim came home with a very sore mouth and a set of what the dentist called “healing dentures” that are temporary dentures he will use while the gums heal. These contain large white straight teeth that look very unnatural. Jim’s comment was “I look like Snaggly Shagnasty” ... whoever that is!
Over the next few days, I felt a deep sadness, and with it – a strange sense of ...shame. Like many adult children of alcoholics, when it comes to my emotions, I am not always quick to identify what is going on and why. Finally, I woke up one morning around 4 a.m. with a revelation. Jim was awake, too. I curled up against him in the dark and asked, “May I share what I am going through?” to which he replied, “Please, do.”
What I realized is how much Jim’s beautiful smile has always meant to me. Jim would smile at me and my heart would light up like a Christmas tree! And I was now feeling real grief at the loss of that beautiful smile. Yes, his teeth were far from perfect, but they made his smile uniquely his. And I felt heartbroken thinking that I would never see that smile again.
Followed by the sadness, shame rolled in. Shame for being sad and feeling my own grief, while just imagining how hard it must be for HIM. After all, I hadn’t lost my teeth. I wasn’t experiencing the physical pain of having a bunch of teeth pulled all at once, nor having to acknowledge the change of my own appearance.
These realizations caused a lot of introspection. Did these changes represent more of life’s milestones? As we humans age, we experience a variety of changes in our day-to-day functionality. Our thought processes often dull, and our bodies experience more obstacles to regular activity. These can be heart wrenching as we learn to let go and accept that ... we are mortal. These bodies are temporary.
One thing that is helping me is that I am learning about the gift of radical acceptance, a term coined by Buddhist teacher, Tara Brach. Instead of being ashamed, I am learning to accept. And in this particular circumstance – I came to accept that grief is normal, and that it is nothing to be ashamed of. I learned to sit with my sadness and allow myself to feel it. To just be who I am, accepting that all of my emotions are allowable and beautiful and worthy to be felt and honored. And to ride the wave of change, accepting that nothing stays the same. Change is constant, because Life IS change.
Emotions and CRV
It has long been known that emotions can derail a CRV session. They really interfere with psychic functioning. Practicing CRV regularly can peel back the protective layers we use to keep ourselves from feeling our emotions. It is almost like lighting the fire under the soup pot. All the dross rises to the top as the soup comes to a boil. CRV has a way of stirring the subconscious pot - much the way hypnosis does.
Unacknowledged emotions can bring a CRV session to a grinding halt, which is why Viewers are encouraged to learn to sit with their emotions and declare them by writing down whatever is going on. Some emotions may be a subconscious reaction to the target, itself. When that happens, we learn even more about ourselves. Some reactions reveal hidden trauma and PTSD that - once recognized - can be healed.
We can use CRV to get to know ourselves better and to recognize emotions as they come up - BEFORE they derail our CRV sessions.. and our lives.Thanks for allowing me to share my battles and victories with you. I don’t use AI to write to you. I just pour out my heart and inevitably, I hear back from some of you that whatever I wrote was “just what I needed right now” – and that makes it all worthwhile.
Have you been going through changes, too? Is there something you can share with me? Write me back at Lori@IntuitiveSpecialists.com . I’d love to hear from you.
Give this a try for a few minutes a day and let me know how it goes.
Huge hug,
Lori
PS - Yesterday, Jim and I toured the venue - Manzano Mountain Retreat - for our first in-person Remote Viewing Getaway coming up October 15th through 18th. Wow! Time is flying! And we only have 15 seats left… This is going to be such a special time together, and I will be meeting some of you face-to-face for the first time, even after years of working with you over Zoom! What a joy! I can hardly wait! We have so much fun planned. If you plan to join us, I encourage you to grab a seat as soon as you can, as they are disappearing fast. It would be so sad to miss meeting you!
